The Thank-You Note

A note of thanks need not be long, but it ought to show that the writer has remembered what was done for him. Promptness matters because gratitude which arrives months after the supper or favour has begun to resemble an item discovered while clearing a drawer.

Method

Write within a day or two. Begin with the thanks themselves: “Thank you for dinner on Thursday,” or “Thank you for the book.” Name the gift, occasion, or assistance rather than referring vaguely to “everything.”

Add a sentence showing how the kindness was received: perhaps the book has already gone beside the bed, the introduction made a difficult appointment easier, or the supper was particularly welcome after a long week. Such a detail carries more conviction than a paragraph of general enthusiasm.

Close with an appropriate future thought: a hope of seeing the person soon, a promise to report upon the book, or a simple renewal of thanks. Sign as you ordinarily sign to that person.

Paper suits hospitality, gifts, condolences, and any kindness which involved trouble. Email is perfectly respectable for professional assistance and much modern correspondence. A text message answers informal favours when that is already the language of the relationship.

Common errors

Length commonly weakens the note, especially when exclamation marks have been recruited to supply a feeling which the words themselves have omitted. “Thanks in advance” belongs to a request; it is a convenient expression in its place, but should not be mistaken for gratitude after a kindness has actually been performed.